Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Personality Profile

Dear Kids:

I took an online personality profile type test. It was exhausting, but interesting, nonetheless. Here is what it had to say. I'd be curious some day to hear your thoughts on how accurate, or inaccurate, you find this to be. It was broken down into categories. I wanted to record it somewhere, and figured this is as good a place as any.

On the Agreeableness Dimension: You are best described as: USUALLY TAKING CARE OF OTHERS

Words that describe you:
Understanding
Unquestioning
Humane
Selfless
Gentle
Kindhearted
Gullible
Indulgent

A General Description of How You Interact with Others
Here's one important truth about you: you have a tender heart. Yes, you know that others need to learn to take care of themselves. Yes, you know they need to accept the consequences of their foolish or bad behavior. And sometimes, even when your instinct is to help them, you will let them fend for themselves and let them suffer the consequences of their choices or circumstances.

But most of the time you are there to help when they need you. If they are in trouble, you offer compassion and go out of your way to be helpful. If they need someone who will listen, you are trustworthy and sympathetic. And you are direct with them; when they need advice or counsel, you offer it in a straightforward, direct manner, without beating around the bush.

You're also smart enough to know that you cannot take good care of others if you fail to take good care of yourself, so you listen to your own wants and needs. If you've run out of sympathetic energy, you spend time restoring yourself. If you've ignored your own pain or frustration, you find a friend who will listen well, or go into your own private healing place and give yourself permission to focus on you.

But before long, you're back at it with your friends, offering a sympathetic ear and compassion on which they learn to trust, also giving straightforward advice and counsel when they ask for it. You do know how to take care of yourself, but your genuine interest is in taking care of others.

On the Openness Dimension you are: CURIOUS

Words that describe you:
Original
Inventive
Thinker
Brave
Eccentric
Avant-Garde
Out-of-Touch
Unique

A General Description of How You Approach New Information and Experiences
You think like an artist. Or better, you SEE like an artist. While most people look at life's straight lines, its height and depth and width, you're bending the lines with your imagination and turning black and white into shades of blue and yellow. And in conversations at work or with your friends you want to ask, "Do you see what I see?" A few might, most don't, but you've piqued everyone's curiosity with your own original and inventive ways of thinking.

You can, if you must, think in conventional ways. But left on your own, you'll usually opt for the eccentric or avant-garde; in fact you're usually bored with what everyone else is comfortable with. You learn from reading, talking, watching people and other fauna and flora, and simply sitting in the soft chair of your mind and wondering how people would learn how to count if they could only use uneven numbers. You are out in front of conventional ideas, bravely originally defining true and false, right and wrong, the good, the bad and the ugly.

On the Emotional Stability dimension you are: VERY RESPONSIVE

Words that describe you:
Emotional
Insightful
Perceptive
Sensitive
Self-conscious

A General Description of Your Reactivity
Each one of us encounters some hard times; we get caught off guard, or feel a sudden swell of emotion, whether from fear, joy, anger or sadness. Life is just like this sometimes. You know that because you are an emotional person. Some people go to great lengths to keep their emotions under wraps, to keep a stiff upper lip, to not let others know what emotions they are feeling. But that is not you. You embrace all of life's emotions, both the joys and the turmoil that life brings our way.

When you're having fun with a group of friends you don't even try to contain your pleasure; you laugh hard and feel every moment of the conversation because of the joy that comes from the experience. You make very intense friendships; ones where all of the depth of emotions that you feel can be shared. Emotions are such an essential part of your everyday life. You may cry at intense movies or when watching a sad story on the evening news. You get angry, at others or at yourself, and you do not stifle it. Emotions drive your personality and your relationships - you simply are what you feel.

You experience both the highs and the lows more profoundly than most. And you usually relish the intensity of your emotions. For sure you enjoy the positive times. There are those times, though, when your feelings get the best of you and you wonder how you will manage the moment. But because you are so in tune with all of your emotions you will experience something very pleasant and will be able to engage with that positive feeling to again enjoy the wonderful intensity that life brings you.

Your approach toward your obligations is: FLEXIBLE

Words that describe you:
Spontaneous
Intuitive
Perceptive
Natural
Somewhat Disorganized
Unpredictable At Times

A General Description of How You Interact with Others
When there's a job to be done, like most people you want to know what the goal is and when it's to be completed. For you, that's a start. Next you want to know what the plan is to get to the goal. So you lay out a plan, or at least the major points of a plan: "Organize the kitchen sometime this spring" or "Get the project at work done as soon as possible." You don't need an in-depth specification of every little detail; in fact you prefer not to work that way. You lay out your goals, develop a general plan, and then you get things done.

You believe in intuition as well as organization. As such, you trust impulses as much as strategies and you value spontaneity as much as you do efficiency. In a word, you like to keep it flexible. When you set out to accomplish a task, you prefer to have some room to maneuver. Like an artist, you find that the best way to reach a goal is not always in a straight line. Some of the most productive times for you are the unplanned moments of inspiration and creativity that just come to you. While you do keep to a general plan, those times of pure vision and originality are what really drive you.

Some of the people who rely completely on an organized approach to getting things done may be surprised at your efficiency. But there is a definite method to your approach. With a creative flair that others may not have anticipated, the original plan gets met and there are often a few extra accomplishments along the way. Your comfort zone starts with a task and a plan but it also requires the freedom to be able to go with your instincts and impulses so that you can not just accomplish the task, you also have the option to explore something brand new along the way.

When it comes to Extraversion you are: OUTGOING

Words that describe you:
Friendly
Gregarious
Full of Life
Unreserved
Kindhearted
Talkative
Emotional
Spontaneous
Vigorous

A General Description of How You Interact with Others
People light you up. In conversations, planning meetings or almost any social situation, you bring your energy and your friendly, outgoing personality into these engagements with other people, and you come away pumped up. You can hardly wait for the next event, as long as other people will be there. And you're good at it.

You know how to communicate. You listen well, the first rule of good communication, and then, when it's your turn, you talk vigorously and with animation; in your uninhibited way you give all that you've got to the encounter.

In situations where you feel very safe, when you know and trust the people you're with, you can be very kindhearted and unrestrained. You let your affection for and pleasure in being with others flow freely. You're wide open And when you get back this same kind of unrestrained warmth, you are deeply satisfied. Because you are so friendly and full of life, these are among your favorite moments.

Friday, May 14, 2010

The Happy Column...

Dear Kids:

On this day in history, May 14, 1987 - I attended my mother's funeral. Kind of depressing, I know. Been thinking about her a lot lately. I know it's been a lot of years since she passed away, but I think that losing your mother is something that pretty much stays with you. Hopefully you will not have to worry about that for a very LONG time :)

I've been trying to envision or imagine what she would be saying to me during these difficult times we are experiencing, with your Father leaving and our divorce. I've been trying to think about what her advice would be. In some ways I can - but in some ways, not - because I wasn't even an adult when she died. I never related to her as an adult, only as a child and teen.

One thing that she did say a lot - which is timeless and applicable in most situations - is this: At the end of your life you will have two columns, one column will be called 'happy minutes' and the other column will be 'unhappy minutes'. Each column will have a total of the minutes you spent in each. Just remember that while you are entitled to be sad, angry, upset, disappointed, etc. - as these are all normal emotions and part of life - how LONG you stay in those emotions is your choice. So for every minute that is spent in the 'unhappy column' - it steals minutes from the 'happy column'. At the end of your life, you want to make sure that the happy column wins!

So - here's to making sure that our happy column is not robbed today!